


Loss

by hamelott



Category: The Librarians (TV 2014)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Talks of Loss, idk it's sad sorry lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-18
Updated: 2017-06-18
Packaged: 2018-11-15 22:59:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11241060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hamelott/pseuds/hamelott
Summary: Prompt: Hi! In honor of Father's Day, I was wondering if you would be willing to write something for me? I was thinking platonic flyzekiel X something where Flynn finds out that his mother died when he was young or Flynn finding out he was abused or something and they get closer? Not only wld Zeke's mom's death fit in w/ canon clues, it wld parallel w/how Flynn's father died, so Flynn and Ezekiel could relate. Maybe Fathers Day is a rough holiday for Flynn, and the others try to cheer him up?oh boy, buckle up kiddos for a sad ride





	Loss

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer, i’ve seen ‘return to king solomon’s mines’ a whopping one [1] time - and i’m pretty sure i fell asleep during it too - so if things with flynn’s dad seem fishy…they are

Flynn, his nose in a book, was trotting down the stairs to the first floor of the Annex when he nearly tripped over Ezekiel Jones. The thief was bent down, hunched over his phone, and had, unsurprisingly, not noticed Flynn’s presence. Flynn was about to make an awkward backtrack when he noticed Ezekiel’s hands shaking. He peered a little closer and found that Ezekiel was looking at a picture.

In the picture appeared to be a little boy and his mother. They were sat on what Flynn assumed to be a park bench. The little boy was grinning up at his mother, a brown teddy bear clutched in his hands. He couldn’t have been more than three or four. His mother was staring down back at him, a soft, loving smile on her face. Both were ignoring the camera, too lost in each other to even realize it was there.

Flynn couldn’t help clearing his throat, voice uncertain as he said, “Uh, Jones?”

Ezekiel nearly dropped his phone and whipped around in his seat to look up at Flynn. He wasn’t crying, but the rims of his eyes were growing red and little pools of tears were building up in the corner of them. He sniffled and wiped petulantly at his nose before turning around again, thumb brushing over the picture that he refused to look back down at. “What do you want, Flynn?”

“I was, uh,” Flynn stammered, holding up his book even though Ezekiel still wasn’t looking at him. He shook his head. “It doesn’t matter. Are you…are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” Ezekiel snapped, keeping his head down. He had his phone turned away now, still refusing to look back at the picture.

“You know,” Flynn murmured, setting down the book and settling in next to Ezekiel on the step. Ezekiel tried scooting away from him, but the stair railing made it impossible to move too far. “You once told us you were an honest thief; I thought you didn’t lie.”

“White lies don’t hurt anybody,” Ezekiel muttered.

“Except the people that tell them,” Flynn said. He nodded to the phone and asked, “Who is she?”

“None of your business,” Ezekiel told him curtly. He still wasn’t getting up and walking away though, and Flynn knew that had to mean something. He wasn’t really the best at ‘touchy-feely’ kind of conversations, but he supposed he could make an exception.

“My dad died when I was nine,” Flynn said quietly, and he noticed Ezekiel peering at him from the corner of his eye. He went on calmly, “He was shot by a man who was his best friend.” He laughed lightly and shook his head. “I guess the Carsen family isn’t lucky when it comes to getting normal, safe jobs.”

“I’m sorry,” Ezekiel murmured.

Flynn shrugged. “It was a long time ago. The wounds have opened and closed, but every time I remember him I don’t remember the way he died. I remember his crazy stories that he told me before I went to bed. I remember the way he loved my mother. He was a good man.”

Ezekiel sighed, his hand clenching around his phone. “She died when I was thirteen. She got really, really sick, and we didn’t have the money to take care of her. She was in so much pain all of the time, but every time I saw her she would smile and hug me and ask me how school was going.”

“She sounds like a good mom,” Flynn murmured.

Ezekiel nodded. “The best.” He laughed a little, and it sounded wet. Flynn noticed him reach up and quickly wipe at his eyes. “If only she knew…”

“Knew what?” Flynn asked.

Ezekiel hung his head. “Just how much of a disappointment I’d turn out to be.”

Flynn frowned at that. “Hey, that’s not fair. Your mother would be very proud of you.” Ezekiel glanced at him, a bitter smile on his face. “Okay, maybe she wouldn’t be proud of everything, but you did the best you could.”

“I could’ve become an accountant or something!” Ezekiel protested. “And instead I took the easy way out and became a criminal.”

“And then a Librarian,” Flynn said quickly. “And now you save the day every single day. You’re a hero, Ezekiel Jones, whether you like or believe it. She’d be proud of that.”

“Yeah, and how do you know?” Ezekiel snapped, crossing his arms over his knees. His cheek was rested on them, face pointed away from Flynn.

“Because I’m proud of you,” Flynn admitted. “And so is Eve and so are the others. We’ve not known you your entire life Ezekiel, but just from what we’ve seen, you’re someone to be proud of. You’ve been through a lot, and you don’t let it get you down.”

Ezekiel shook his head, lifting it to glance at Flynn again. “Does it get easier? I mean, every year it’s the same deal and every year it feels just as hard.”

Flynn shrugged, sighing. “You know, it kind of does, but not necessarily in a good  _or_ bad way. You kinda forget what the pain felt like until all you remember is the good stuff. It’ll suck eventually because you’ll lose someone again, and you’re just reminded of it. And then you have to deal with the new ones  _and_ the old.”

“Your mom, Judson,” Ezekiel murmured, realization hitting him, “Charlene, I-.”

“And then you remember how you got through it the last time,” Flynn interrupted, looking ahead with a glossy look in his eyes. “You’ve been through it before, and you’ll get through it again. You just…you gotta remember the good stuff.” Flynn glanced at him, a small rueful grin tugging at the side of his mouth. “Y’know, I always thought losing someone you didn’t know was harder because you don’t know how to miss them, but it’s losing the people you  _did_  know and knew you…that’s the harder one. But, at least, with those people you’ve got the memories, both the good and the bad, and you get to pick.”

“Pick?” Ezekiel asked quietly.

Flynn nodded. “You get to pick how you see them. Are you going to remember your mom as a woman who would’ve been disappointed in you? Or are you going to remember her as the woman who loved you from the moment she laid eyes on you and would understand the things you went through?”

“I think I like the second one better,” Ezekiel admitted.

“Good,” Flynn murmured, “because it’s probably what she would’ve wanted to be remembered as.”

Ezekiel sighed and looked ahead too. “They would’ve been proud of you too, mate…all of them.”

Flynn ducked his head. “Yeah, I hope so.”

“You said your dad told you stories?” Ezekiel asked, hating the silence that filled the air and threatened to suffocate them.

Flynn grinned at that. “Yeah, the silliest things…well, I guess I  _thought_  they used to be. Now, though, not so much.” He paused for a few moments before asking, “Can I see her?”

Ezekiel slowly nodded and hit a button on his phone, bringing the picture back up. He was smiling now too, a slow tear working its way down his cheek. “She really was the best mom.”

Flynn swung an arm over Ezekiel’s shoulders, squeezing lightly. “I’m sure she was.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hey there, thanks for reading this! I kind of strayed away from the prompt a little and to Kira (queerseth/SnorkleShit) I do apologize for it lol but I appreciate the prompt! 
> 
> I know it's a little late and cutting it close, but happy Father's Day to everybody out there whether you are a dad, have a dad, or even don't have a dad (i'm with you on that one). Take the day (or what's left of it) to laugh at some horrible jokes and make a porch with some of your buddies ;)


End file.
